Who am I?

In therapy this week my therapist drew a diagram that looked kinda like this. She was showing me how I have surrounded myself with all these things related to my mental health and how it kinda keeps me stuck in it. It makes it hard for me to reach out of that inner circle and be who I really am. This leads into my homework assignment which is to write a paper on who I am without my mental health struggles. Honestly when I think about who I am I think PPOCD. It is all I have known for the last 4+ years and it has controlled me. It's time to take back my life. I am NOT PPOCD! Sadly I have neglected who I really am and that makes this assignment hard for me. I did what I needed to do in order to feel safe, and that has meant neglecting my relationships with family, friends, and with God. I think for me to know who I am I need to start being what I am. I don't know if that makes sense. Like I know that I am a mom. I have 3 kids that remind me of that everyday. It's a succesful day in our house if the kids eat 3 meals and are still wearing their clothes at the end of the day. But there is so much more to being a mom than just feeding and dressing the children. I have friends, but there is more that I could be doing to be a friend. I am a Daughter of God, but at the end of most days I'm too stubborn and tired to pray. I don't know. Maybe I am being too hard on myself. I know that I have focused most of my attention on my mental health, but that is because I was in such a scary place and I'm afraid that if I'm not constantly thinking about or doing something that has to do with mental health I will find myself back in that place. It has been almost 9 months now since the scary episodes. I am more stable now. It is time for me to start making some changes. The inner and outer circles need to switch places. I need to look at all this mental health stuff differently. Here is my new diagram.
I like that one a lot better! I am not my mental health struggles, but through these life experiences I can be made a stronger daughter, sister, friend, mother, and daughter of God. I will finish this post with some words from a church primary song that just popped into my head. I know who I am. I know God's plan. I'll follow him in faith. Oh and today I found joy in listening to my 5 year old son giggle all day. He really is the cutest boy ever!