MOODY MONDAY

They call me mellow yellow. I'm going to be kind to myself and start the week out yellow. It's not a jump up and down so excited to be alive yellow. It's just like I said.... mellow yellow. I don't have anything to complain about. I don't feel stressed or anxious. I feel content. All good things. I saw the psychiatric np again last week. We decided to raise my medication. She is hoping to zap the intrusive thoughts, and I'm just hoping the rest of my brain doesn't get zapped:) No but really it would be nice if the thoughts and images would completely go away. It's like being the main character in a horror movie and not being able to stop it. It's nowhere near as bad as it used to be. Thankgoodness! I so badly want to put this all behind me and move on with my life. I wish that I would have talked to someone 4 years ago when this all started. Life would probably be a lot easier. Oh well. It is what it is. I am moving on and I am getting better. Even if it is 2 steps forward 1 step back. Oh and I find immense joy in the freckles on the cheeks of my 5 year old. I love that boy so much! Have a great week!